Before filming starts on this latest project I have a few days to sit, enjoy the spring weather and pour over the reams of dialogue to learn. Naturally this takes up a short amount of daytime hours - so what to do for the rest?
Switch on the TV of course - bound to be someone I know on there? After a couple of weeks flicking through the freeview channels I have to say I'm ready to explode with new program suggestions. How about a new cooking show where you actually use your own body parts to create a pretentiously classic dish with a modern twist - such as the recent puke making delight I saw: Duck in Hoi-sin sauce Shepherds Pie? Or how about a couple with too much money sell their over stuffed house in the city and move lock stock and two tasteless barrels to the countryside, whereupon they cut down all the Forrest and drain the lake to create a quadbike track for Tarquin? Not forgetting, of course, the truthful and gritty beautiful people shows that frequent our TV's full of issues to attract us - issues that just happen to feature the scantily clad model type schoolgirls. And don't get me started on the chat shows...
Oh how I love to shout at daytime TV...anyway, back to my script.
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