I'M SENSING A PATTERN HERE!

So I'm doing this theatre festival, which is great fun of course. My character is a woman with, shall we say, manly characteristics....

I'm sensing a pattern here, it's not the first time. Now, I'm a tall actress, that's for sure but does that mean I'm forever destined to play women playing men, lesbians or actual men? It's definitely a skill I can do but sometimes I do long for the girly, the cute, the feminine, the sexy. You know the type of part where I get to wear sexy clothes and cross my legs when I sit down!

Maybe I'll grow into it one day!

For those of you who know me I have a confession... I lie on my CV and tell directors that I'm 5'9", I think I'm more like 5'11" but what's a couple of inches between friends. Speaking of which I actually have two friends, Ruth & Steph, who are a very similar height to me so why doesn't this acting business reflect that women are taller nowadays and stop asking me to play men? It's a legitimate question don't you think?

Anyway back to thinking with my penis and sitting with my legs astride!

Not A Thigh Slap In Sight

So I'm going to be in a play! Yep this TV actress is going to dare to perform live and not in some panto in the wilds of Cumbria...


It's very exciting actually, a physical piece, demanding, exhausting and (although I'm only 2 rehearsals in) I find I'm laughing more than I have for ages.


I'd forgotten what it was like to bond with a company of actors. "One doesn't do that in La Television, darrrling, one is an island!" It's going to be good I can feel it in my water.

The play is a new piece by Ian Moore (hereafter known as The Boss) called The Inconsistent Whisper Of Insanity.  As this is an anonymous blog that's more information than I should have told you, I feel slightly sweaty now! What the hell we need bums on seats!

Anyway...my character is a tall, Russian woman. Nice? That sounds glamourous doesn't it? WRONG!

Firstly think Soviet Union not Russia. Are you loosing sight of those beautiful blonde girls that marry English men yet? Now imagine a concrete tower block and lots of potato soup! See those pretty girls are a distance away now aren't they?

My character, let's call her Svetlana, is more your shotputter than your table dancer. She' (in my head) is quite large and slightly obnoxious! Sounds good so far right?

Where did I put those steroids??????

Go For It Christian!

I'm pleased as punch for my friend Christian Mckay in the film 'Me and Orson Wells'. This is a man who is an example to us all: bloody hardworking, charming and hugely entertaining, it has been my pleasure to work with the chap and drink with the chap: both of which were great fun!

The papers are tipping him to be nominated for an oscar, who knows I might actually start watching the ceremony again.

Well done to you Christian (as I know it was not an "overnight success" as the papers report - you've slogged it out for a while)!